On the night shift last night I was attacked by a huge cat-like beast whilst relieving myself in the park. So begins the hunt for the Beast of Burton Road. It has struck seven times this month. Usually goes for rabbits. It must have been hungry.

Took Doris to a Spiritualist Church and she told me there’s an angry spirit which is now haunting our cab. Let her have the ride for free. Cab keeps getting cold now and things keep disappearing. Told Ben but he says its all bollocks.

Our chief Mo is well angry after we wrecked the rest area playing that game of Kabbadi.